Look for the Helpers

Dear Collective,

The human brain is a pretty good pattern-recognition device.

When things are going well, it strings together good moments and tells you that life is going well. But when things go sideways, that same brain goes on high alert. It starts connecting every negative dot, trying to prove to you that everything is falling apart, that the world is cold, and that people can't be trusted.

I lived that spiral this past week.

It started on Sunday. I chipped a tooth pretty severely. It looked awful, I was embarrassed by it, and I spent the start of the week hating the way I looked every time I saw a mirror.

Then Tuesday rolled around.

In an effort to keep up my daily health habits, I’m trying to get between 10,000 and 13,000 steps every day. I threw on my old Windy City coat, a coat I took from my dad years ago that I have now worn for more years than he ever did. The only problem with that coat is the pockets are notoriously shallow.

Somewhere along the sidewalk, my wallet slipped out.

I realized it later that evening. By 8:00 or 9:00 PM, I was out in the dark with a flashlight, retracing every single step (roughly 8,000 steps) on the sidewalk, praying I would spot it on the grass. Nothing.

This was the first time in my life I had ever lost my wallet or my license.

Immediately, my brain went straight to the cynical default. I told myself that whoever picked it up was already running up charges on the credit cards. I went home, started locking down accounts, ordered replacement cards, and reached out to the DMV for a new ID.

By Wednesday, the spiral was complete. I had a chipped tooth, no money, no ID, and a brain working overtime to convince me that everything was garbage.

Thursday morning brought the first bit of relief. I finally got into the dentist, they fixed the tooth in about ten minutes, and I walked out feeling normal again. But the dark cloud hadn't fully cleared. I went into work thinking, "Great, my tooth is fixed, but I still have no wallet and no money."

Then came Thursday evening. I walked down the driveway and opened the mailbox.

If you told me a director or a marketing department staged it, I wouldn't have argued with you. Sitting right there, placed perfectly on top of a couple of bills, was my wallet.

Nothing had been touched. My cards were there, my ID, and even the Menards gift card was still tucked inside.

A total stranger found a lost wallet on a dark street, picked it up, checked the address, and walked it over to my house just to drop it safely in my mailbox.

They didn't leave a note. They didn't ask for a reward. They just did the right thing.

It completely shattered the negative story my brain had spent two days constructing.

There is a famous quote from Mr. Rogers I’m reminded of.

"When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.'"

When bad days stack up, it is so easy to fall into cynicism. It is easy to assume the worst about strangers, get defensive, and let frustration harden your heart. But cynical thinking is lazy.

It takes strength to believe in people. It takes strength to remember that decency, kindness, and honesty are still alive and well right here in our neighborhood. The helpers are always out there, even when you least expect them.

This week, don't let a bad moment or a tough streak convince you that the world is against you. Notice the good, trust the people around you, and look for opportunities to be the helper who does the right thing when nobody is watching.

With Strength and Gratitude,

Charlie

We, The Collective Fitness